I'm in mourning...

Friday, July 16, 2010

Rather than go into the office yesterday, I chose to take the day off to mourn. I rented Bright Star, Roman Holiday, and, yes, The Happening. Although I had heard bad things, I wasn't about to give up on one of my favorite directors. The movie was obviously not his best work, and was executed poorly, but I think overall his idea was unique and interesting, it was just lacking.

I ordered Sara's headstone today. It was very tough. I'm taking it pretty hard, I think. But I'm happy that today's Friday so I have a couple more days of nothing. I can't stop thinking about her and how I wasn't there to sleep with her on her last night and that she wasn't feeling well. Its good and bad that I wasn't there. I think it will be more difficult for me when I go home next.

Sara's death has just added more stress on top of the job search. I'm feeling very discouraged and anxious. I don't want to move away from the city already. I'm quickly losing faith in myself which is unlike me, I think.

On a lighter note, a few days ago I was in an elevator with Alan Cumming at a building in midtown. That was pretty cool since I love Romy and Michelle. What's even more exciting is that I have to go back to that building today and rumor has it Gaga is there! I'd love to bump into her, though I don't know if I could contain my excitement. Chances are I won't even see her anyway.

Who knows what I'll do this weekend. D wants to hang out again, I may see my friend E, and, if K doesn't go to Connecticut for the weekend, I really want to go with her to Tortilla Flats, since I haven't been yet. Anything to keep up my energy really.

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