The Lamp Battle

That fucking lamp!

When I moved into my new apartment one of the old tenants left a lamp. It's a simple floor lamp with no shade, just a bulb on a metal pole, essentially. When my mom was visiting, she ordered a red lampshade as well as the little piece which attaches the lamp shade to the lamp.

Simple enough.....right?

WRONG.

The shade and metal piece was delivered about two weeks ago. In order to get the metal piece onto the lamp we had to take the entire thing apart. I had to unscrew all the screws, take apart the wires and pull the cord out from the metal pole in order to get the metal piece onto the pole. This was a huge hassle. My room mate and I spent an hour doing all of this until we realized that the little piece didn't even fit on the pole. FUCK! So now we have screws everywhere and a cord which absolutely WILL NOT fit back through the metal pole. I mean it. I tried snaking it through. I tied thread onto the cord and tried pulling the thread first to help get it through. I spent way too much time trying to get this piece of shit put back together and I have nothing. The result: we had to throw away the lamp pieces and now all we're left with is a bulb and a shade. The cheapest thing on the Bed Bath and Beyond website which looks like the shade would fit is $129.00!!

I so wish my dad was here to help me figure this out! I love the little lamp shade and really want to use it. But as of right now it's just sitting on my keyboard looking absolutely stupid. Maybe one day I'll get this figured out. Maybe?